Three weeks and Aisha still goes to school believing I'm waiting for her under the tree near her school! I tried to tell her the truth, explaining to her it is hard to stand there alone under the tree. I tell her that I'll go home and the come back in the afternoon to take her home. She accepts, but when she reaches school she requests me for it again, "Mom, please wait for me under the tree." She swallows hard to suppress her spurting sobs, and when I see it, I am not able to deny her plead. Another false 'Yes'. Everyday I go to school determined to give her a 'No' for her request, but then in the end I find myself giving up! I walk back home regretting lying to her. What do I do?
@ school and not so happy about it!


I'm Bored.

Its the first day of Aisha's second week at school, and I'm already getting bored without her near me. I feel like stopping her school. Aisha doesn't cry anymore, but in the mornings she says she feels sleepy. There is no fuss, Alhamdulillah. She gets excited once we are out of our home. She still believes in the small lie I told her, that I'm waiting for her in the shade of the tree near her school. I explained to her today that I cannot always stand there, I've got to work at home. But she asked me to stay near her school for today, and I agreed. Once at school, she grabbed her bag from me, handed it to her teacher, removed her shoes and put it in the shoe-box and sat in her place. Oh, my God, Masha Allah, how much has my little girl grown up! I couldn't believe she could do all of these by herself. She is still my little girl! She called me and waved me good-bye. I was in tears, I didn't want to leave her. She shouted, "Mom, wait for me in the shade!" I struggled to say yes, and then I returned home. I wish it was 3 pm soon. A whole week has stretched itself, and I wish it was weekend again so that I could get my girl back to me for the whole day!
Monday morning mirth.


School Days

Aisha's school days has not been as good as imagined. I should have expected these troubles, but I simply thought she would be happy to go to school. She is happy with school , but her problem is 'Mom should sit at school'.
On the second day, she started crying when we reached the school gate, and was shouting at the top of her voice when I was going back. I felt very very sad. When I went to pick her up at 3 pm, she was sleeping. She promised the teacher to come back the next day. But when I was putting her to sleep, she said she didn't want to go to school without Mom.
Yesterday she started crying when she woke up. She didn't want to go to school, and she brought up all excuses she could think of - the boys are naughty, the teacher doesn't sing, the teacher scolded her ( no answer for my question of why the teacher scolded, or what she said) and more. To console her, I said I'll ask the teacher if I could sit in the school. She kept on repeating it again and again, to ask the teacher if I could sit in the school. When we reached the school, she was crying aloud. I told her I'll wait for her by the gate. But the teacher asked me to go, for seeing me makes her cry more. She was shouting, "mom, stay by the gate." I felt really sad and thought not to send her to school again. May I should have gone for some counselling before sending her to school. I went to school early to bring her back, and the teacher scolded me for taking the kid away before the time. But Aisha seemed happy, and wanted to go to school again.
At night, she asked me why I came back home when I had promised her I'll stay by the school gate. I had to lie to her. "I stayed at the gate and when I felt so hot, I moved towards the shade of a tree and sat down. That's why Aisha couldn't see me." I never thought the rest of her days were more peaceful with this one lie.
At night, I tried to explain to her that she cannot always have Mom in her life. I told her how I'm living without my Mom, and how everybody have to live their Mom at some time in their life. I asked her if her cousins are taking their moms to school. She listened silently, and at last concluded, "I need Mom at school!"
Aisha @ school.
Today, she said she felt sleepy in the morning. "I'll go to school once when I wake up after sleep." I knew she was creating another excuse to not go to school. I bathed her and dressed her and started off to school. She followed me, asking me to wait for her by the gate. I said yes. When we reached the school, she went into her classroom and sat down on the bench. No cries, no fuss. I was surprised. The teacher told me Aisha never gives her bag to the teacher. I asked Aisha to give her bag to the teacher, so that she can hang it on the wall. Aisha obeyed. I was happy to see her adapting to her new life of teachers and friends. When she came back, she said, "Mom, I was happy to know you were waiting for me in the shade of the tree." When will I be able to tell her the truth?


To pre- school.

And the big day arrived...
Ready for school.

We have been planning to go to school since November and it was today we actually did it. The blame is on me - my constant procrastination. I was also a little bit worried, may be all mothers do worry about sending their kids to school. Will they take good care of our angels, will some one hurt them and so many other senseless worries. 'Senseless' was my worry too, for when I went to pick her, my little smart girl was really managing everything by herself!
Her school is an Anganawadi run by the government of India, and they provide kids with nutritious food and health-care activities, together with pre-school activities. She has got a teacher and an Anganawadi Worker, or helper, to take care of the kids. There were 16 kids, but that number changes everyday.

 She was happy and excited about school, thanks to her cousins who are going to school, and they love it. But she started crying when the helper at school took her, and she was yelling when we, myself and my Father-in-law, returned back. As the rule, parents are not allowed at the school premises. It took all my heart to come back from my crying girl. I wanted to go back and bring her home. Even at home, I missed her a lot. I kept myself busy, so that time would fly fast.
 The helper asked me to come back at noon, as it is the first day for her. Usually the timing is from 10 am to 3 pm. I didn't know what they meant by 'noon', but since I was dying to see her, I went as early as possible. When I went back, she came running to me, crying. The helper told me she was fine till she saw me. Kids don't miss us as we miss them. She was given her lunch from school, and she ate it all by herself (which she has not done from home for more than a couple of times). She completed it, took the plate to the wash area. The helper washed her hands and mouth. We returned home, promising to go back tomorrow. I was afraid if she will dislike her school , but she told me she liked it and wanted to go there again. Alhamdulillah!!


Mom's Love.

Today we were watching some video songs on my phone. When a song ended, Aisha pointed to another song and asked, "Mom, you like this song, right? "
"Yes, darling." I said. She clicked the song.
"Do you like it?" I asked.
"No." She said.
"Then why are you playing it?" I asked. The phone was with her.
" 'Coz you like it." Her quick reply.
I felt at the top of the world. Alhamdulillah, thank You, Allah, for this wonderful daughter.


Three years.

Can't believe it! Aisha is three years now and oh! Alhamdulillah...Alhamdulillah, again a zillion times.... For this beautiful sweet little girl You have gifted me. How can I ever thank You, oh! my Lord, for these three wonderful years! Please take care of her, for none other than You can take care of her. Without Your care, no one can take care of her. Please help me to bring her up with the best virtues. Please guide her through the right path, guide us and guide everyone on earth. Please, please, my Lord, make for her a beautiful home in paradise. No one but You can do it for her. Show mercy on her, and shower Your blessings on her. Thank You again, for giving such a great blessing for me. Thank You for giving me the best daughter, and making me her mother.


Prayer Dress.

Aisha is waiting for me for the Zuhr prayer. At moments like these, words are never enough for us to express our feeling... Feeling of happiness, love, being blessed, thankfulness and every other good feeling. Oh! Allah! Show us the right path and bless us with paradise! Ameen.


Back to India.

So many things are happening...
Aisha's paternal great-grandmother died some days back. Inna lillahi wa inna ilaihi rajioon. I think Aish is the only great grand-daughter who has spent a lot of her time with grandma. She was a healthy person, although menatlly unstable, and died of no illness. It was sudden, which was shocking for us.
We got a new member to our family, my nephew on 14th. Masha Allah, our family is growing bigger and bigger!
We came back to India on 19th, since our visas got cancelled when Dad changed his job. Once again to our dear motherland. Aisha was happy to see her grandparents, hens, squirrels, cats etc etc. We had a marriage function on 20th. It was a four hour drive, and there were 7 of us. We had a happy trip and Aisha was excited to see her cousin after some 10 or 20 days. The marriage was at my sister-in-law's.

We stopped at a beach on our way back home, so that we could stretch our legs for a few minutes.
And on 21st, we went to see our new family memebr, Nidal Hammad.

It was a busy week. Hoping to take some rest now.


Eid ul Adha.

Happy Eid!
We just came back from Eid gah, and now we are going to Abudhabi to visit friends and relatives. See you all after that.


Swimming pool.

I took Aisha to the swimming pool today, and I promise I'll never take her again! She wanted to go to the middle of the pool, which was very deep and I was afraid to leave her, although she had air filled tubes attached to her. I caught hold of her tightly and she struggled to get free. It was a water-fight rather than a swimming session! I immersed her in water 2 to 3 times. I expected her to be afraid of completely going down in water, but she enjoyed it. Why are kids these days afraid of nothing? Trying to grab her with all my strength, I got exhausted and my muscles started aching. She did not want to return from the pool, and I dragged her out of the pool. She was kicking and beating me all the way home.
Swim suit.

Aisha's cousin, Aisha and myself in the pool.


Farewell party.

Aisha's Dad got a new offer and so he resigned from the old job. Aisha new most of his colleagues and their families. She will surely miss them, and those small gatherings we often had. Today was our last party with our friends. Our farewell party.
Gifts for Aisha.



Speaking in English.

I don't know how, but Aisha has got the notion that to speak in English one should add an 's' at the end of the words. And to speak in Malayalam, she adds the plural sound used in malayalam -kal. It goes like this:

"Ente kalippattams evide?" (Where are my toys?) 
"Aa boys-ukale nokkku!" (Look at the boys!)

On the toy-phone, she says something nobody understands, and when asked what she was she talking, the quick reply comes, "I was talking in English!" Well, she adds some words like come, play, sit stand etc in between the lines.



The festival of Malayalees, Onam, is also a festival in UAE, especially for the department stores that make everything a consumer product. This time there were flower carpets, big and small, in most places. The ona sadhya (feast) is served in banana leaves, and Aisha wanted one leaf when she saw stacks of it in the store. So we
A small flower carpet.
too decided to cook a sadhya for Onam. Sadhya is a pure vegetarian meal with lots of side dishes along with rice. We flipped through cook-books, browsed the cookery sites and asked our parents for suggestions of experiences. Shopping for the banana leaves and vegetables was the next step. We bought six leaves for everyone of us, and Aisha and her cousin divided it themselves from the store.
Eating on a banana leaf was new to Aisha. It is a common practice in Kerala to serve on banana leaves. The senior citizens still believe that food tastes better when served on banana leaves. Aisha was impatient for having to wait for so long to eat on a banana leaf. We prepared dinner so that everyone can join in for it. But Aisha and her cousin couldn't wait to be served on leaf and so they had their dinner earlier, before Dad reached home.



Some poems recited by Aisha. Now-a-days its been difficult to record her audios or videos because she wants to be the one behind the camera. This audios were recorded with great effort.

A malayalam poem.

The first stanza of the song 'I am a barbie girl.'

First stanza of the Arabic song 'Shakhbit shakhabit.'



Aisha was afraid of beaches the last time we took her to a beach. But that was during the night, when we could hear only the roaring of the sea. This time, she enjoyed most of it. She got drowned once when she fell flat into the water. A wave pushed her down, she was immersed in water from head to toe. But she was never frightened. She was excited to play in the water and she wanted to go deep into the sea. In the end, we had to drag her into the car to go home.


Enjoying outdoor.

A drop in temperature brought a change in entertainment activities in Dubai. People are seen often in open-air areas. We went over to a near by park to celebrate the climate change.


Eid al Fitr

Ramadan was over before I knew it, and now Eid has also come to an end. When its over, I feel the anticipation was a better feeling! We had guests for Eid, mostly my in-laws. It was a busy day. We attended the Eid prayers and then returned home to prepare the lunch. Even though Aisha was sleepy during the prayer, she never made any fuss. She slept as soon as we reached home and so it was easy for me to concentrate on the lunch.

Eid dress.
While the adults were busy cooking, the kids had a party time.
Our room looked like an artist's work area with the colors, water and papers spread on the floor.  



Aisha learned her capital letters from A to F. She points other alphabets if we ask her, but she is not thorough with it. For some letters, like S, when asked she replies "Scooter", as in the rhyme S is for scooter. Same came with I - ice cream. The credit goes to an ABC learning game on my phone, which helped her to learn the letters. Now we have got another time-pass activity at home, to find out the hiding alphabets. I take a newspaper or anything that has letters on it, and ask her to find letters. We do play this game from every place - there is no place without letters around you. When travelling, I ask her to count how many As or Bs or Cs she sees, teaching her to count and the letters. It is a good way to keep her occupied. She also knows it when I write her name, although she does not know the letters in it.


Art work.

Some of my drawings I did for Aisha. She often comes to me asking me to draw something for her. I google 'how to draw' sites and make the sketches.


No to Diapers.

I stopped using diapers for Aisha. Now that she started communicating her needs for nature's call, I decided to stop using diapers. We went for shopping, and I kept asking Aisha every half-an-hour if she needed to pee. She informed when when she had to pee. I never thought it would be this easy for a girl who never mentioned her peeing or pooing until two months back. She started to tell me her need for peeing/pooing as soon as we reached Dubai. I don't know why the change happened - may be because she sees her elder cousin doing it from here, while in India her younger cousin never mentions his pee/poo. anyways, Alhamdulilla, everything is fine now and we have said goodbye to diapers forever, insha Allah. But I have got a new packet of diapers with me, so now what do I do with it?


Learning self-sufficiency.

For the first time, Aisha ate her lunch all by herself. Until today, it was Mom or Dad feeding her. But today, with her cousin Z, she declared she too will take lunch herself. So I put some rice and her favorite yogurt curry, which she finished all by herself.
My little girl is growing 'big', masha Allah!

One of the reasons I don't allow her eating alone is the mess she makes out of it. But today she made it almost clean and complete. May be it is all my mistake of not giving her the opportunity to prove she can do it herself. Our kids grow up before we know it.
It has been months since I started teaching Aisha how to ride a tri-cycle, but she never listens to me. Last week, she managed to do it all by herself. I don't know how she suddenly started riding it. Kids are always full of surprises. 


Back to Dubai

Again back to heat. Time for morning rushes, boring days and indoor games. Well, I think Aisha is good at adopting to  her situations. When in India, she never asks for anything that is in Dubai, including her Dad, and now once in Dubai she never asked me to take her to her grandpa (my worst fears). Alhamdulillah for this sweet little girl.
We returned to Dubai on 19th, flying with Emirates. Aisha spent half of the journey browsing the TV, and the rest half she slept. I ordered her meal, but she did not eat it. Thank God, this time her usual ear problem did not effect her. She woke up from her sleep when we reached the luggage counter, and was happy to see her dad once again.